Bus Route

Excerpts from the Script: Pages 2-6

Thomas: 43 year-old, African American, bus driver

(Baritone voice: A recorder makes the following announcement)

These are the basic bus rules...

No loud talking on cellphones that can disturb other riders.

No open containers for beverages or food.

No loud music.

Be courteous to other passengers.

Dispose of trash in basket in front of the bus.

Federal law requires front seats be reserved for handicapped and elderly riders.

Assaulting a bus driver is a Federal offense that will result in fines and imprisonment


Next stop is Martin Luther King, Jr. Boulevard

(All passengers are on cellphones. Silent chatter)

Sarah: 47 year-old, beauty consultant, white lesbian

I love, love, love selling cosmetics. My line of Divalicious make-up products are very expensive, but totally worth every penny. Being a make-up artist is the easiest way to pick-up pretty chics, besides working in a woman's prison. Customers are usually, either vain, with big egos, thinking they're Queens or Goddesses. Or, they have low self-esteem issues and feel unworthy and ugly. Both ways, they're easy bait. Easy women are sleazy women and not wifey material. (Pause) Yes, I give skincare consults, tips and tricks for faces, eyes and lips. For the cuties, that I want to date, I share my employee discount on mascara, lipstick, blushes and eyeshadow.


Coming up on A. Phillip Randolph Street

Anika: 38 year-old, materialistic, high maintenance wife from Delhi, India

When I first came to America, I was very traditional, wearing Saris, sandals and flowing scarves. Even in public, I trailed behind my husband and was very meek. Now, I buy designer fashions from Neiman Marcus, Lord & Taylor and Saks Fifth Avenue. My personal hair stylist is the owner of Pyramid Salon and she comes to my home for weekly appointments for my manicures, pedicures, eyebrow tinting and threading. We, Divas, deserve the best. What else is there to do with all that money flowing in? America is truly the land of opportunity.


Everyday I go into work, I have to pinch myself because I can't believe I'm getting paid to do what I love and that's being a beauty consultant. (Pause) I dream of meeting the woman I'll marry, at work, so we can start a family. I already have my tux picked out for the wedding and found an openly gay preacher, in Buckhead, to perform a quick ceremony at Shout Hallellujah Chapel. (Raise arm and snap fingers).


Next stop is Angela Davis Street


Yes, I get full-body and foot massages. (Hushed) And, Brazillian Waxes. Let's just keep that a little secret between us girls, okay? (Pause) Well, I'd be driving the Lambroghini, but Adavan locked it in the garage when he went to India to visit relatives, which is better than locking me in the garage. (Pause) My dear, he knows better than to think I'll ever return to the old ways. I'd divorce him in a heartbeat and my lawyers would take him to the cleaners. (Pause) Darling, be patient. Your husband will come around. Women's lib schooled both of us!


Next stop Naazir Ra Court

Isabella: 26 year-old, Mexican restaurant server and mother

Oh, my God! It's so cruel what the Trump administration did to my family. (Wiping tears from her eyes). My husband was deported, months ago, and I was sent to a detention center until recently. Those bastards in Immigrations took my three older children and placed them in foster care, with total strangers. (Pause) Luck! Oh, no. Luck had nothing, at all, to do with it. I got the best Immigrations Attorney in America, who teamed up with ACLU attorneys to fight my deportation. I was given asylum because my baby was born in America.


Coming up, Maynard Jackson Parkway

Lianzo: 17 year-old, hip-hop rapper, Jamaican

'Ya mon. I go to the record studio every weekend to cut music. Dem brothas, no joke. (Pause) Oh, yah, dey da best around. Already, I gotz me a lawyer to protect my music rights and to see to it that I don't git ripped off like doze suckers in the TV series, 'bout dem fools who let da mon steal him money. My kids, they gotz to eat. (Pause) Man, if they betray me, I go crazy. I got git me machete and go gansta and kill all 'dem thieves.


Coming up on Asa Hilliard Street

Dazzlin: 15 year-old, pregnant, high school student, Puerto Rican

Mommy, worry is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but won't get you anywhere. (Irritated) Just because I'm pregnant doesn't mean my brain doesn't work, anymore. I'm going to finish school with honors and get a full scholarship to college. (Pause) Jangles loves me, but he knows I come from a middle-class family and education is very important. I'm not getting married until I graduate from college and he may not stick around that long. He has been talking to a military recruiter. (Pause) Yes, mom, I know, right now his options are few and he's not ready to be a dad.

Thomas (Excerpts from pages 11 - 12)

Next stop Opray Winfrey Way

John: 10 year-old, white, boy scout from West Virginia

But mom! I want to go camping with my troop because they're going white water rafting and horse back riding. (Pause) You know I would've made the merit role, if you had used the money to get me a tutor instead of using it to get Meth. (Whining) Now, you're punishing me for failing sixth grade, again. That's 'triflin! I'll be the only kid not going camping this summer. Damn, dad was right about you!


Next stop Oprah Winfrey Way

Mike Dumpling: 24 year-old, over-weight, tattoo artist

Thanks buddy for the pep talk, but, I've heard it all before. (Mockingly) For every size man there is, there's a desperate woman who loves just that size. They come in all shapes and attitudes. There are short ones, tall ones, fine ones, kind ones. Man, I'm 'tellin you, it's all BULL! I never saw a buffet that I didn't like and I'm digging my massive grave one bite at a time. I'll need an oversized casket and they're expensive. (Pause) Yea, yea, yea! I know. I'm only 24; too young to give up, but I'd rather be dead than fat. (Takes another bite into an oversized donut).


Next stop Condoleeza Rice Road

Jose: 28 year-old, Mexican landscaper

Yea, dude. The bank is going to give me a loan to start my own business, but I can't read the application and all I'm asking you to do is help me out with it. (Pause) No man, I can't pay you upfront, but my word is good. You'll get your money. You know I'm the best landscaper around and I have contracts with 15% of the residents in the Hunt Cliff area. (Pause) 'Bro, we got to work together to succeed. (Pause) No, I didn't do your sister wrong. She was the one who played out on me, with my best friend, Miguel. I broke our engagement off because that baby ain't mine. (Pause) No man. She lied. I never laid a finger on her.


Next stop Colin Powell Parkway

Tyrone: 20 year-old, African-American, carwash worker, rural Georgia

Man, when I flew from Whiney Grove, Arkansas to Atlanta, on a propeller plane, last month, the airline gave me FREE peanuts, FREE pretzels and FREE Coca-Cola. Discount ain't good enough. I likes whatever is FREE. Call me cheap if you want. A penny saved is a penny earned (Pause) Whatever! I just love free stuff. (Pause) Back on topic, eating all that FREE junk food helped distract me from that propeller plane shaking so bad. I was so skurred. By the time my plane landed at Fulton County Airport, I was a nervous wreck, but at least I weren't hungry.

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